I’ve had a few breakdowns in my life; I’m not ashamed of it. Sometimes we need to be broken down to build ourselves up stronger and smarter for the future. I truly believe there is strength in allowing yourself to break and really feel what you are going through. I, as well as many others, have a healing aura. We attract the damaged and try to make them whole again. It’s a great gift, but what I didn’t realize was this was becoming a one way exchange of energy for me. I was giving and not refilling myself, so eventually, I felt drained, sad, and unfulfilled. I didn’t realize how much of me was being taken; I also didn’t realize that I was doing NOTHING for myself, yet doing everything for others.
If you haven’t notice, I haven’t written anything in a few months. It’s not that I didn’t have topics that I felt needed to be discussed, it’s because I could not give an more of myself. Deciding to unplug from my blog was not an easy decision for me. I know I have dedicated readers that look forward to my pieces each week, but in order to refill my cup I had to put the focus back on me and really figure out how to be a healer/online presence without completely draining myself every few months. Truthfully, I’m still working on it, but I’ve achieved much more of a balance in life and have actually been able to work on some other passion projects without feeling distracted or guilty.
I’ve been keeping a bit of a presence and showing you the massive amounts of pampering I’ve been indulging in. Massages, facials, nails, walks… I’m allowing others to refill my empty energy cup and it’s been doing wonders for me. It’s the reason I’m writing to you right now! My mind isn’t going 100mph, my intentions have become more organic and I don’t feel pressure. Instead of treating this as a job with a deadline, I’m treating it like a journal. Taking little quiet moments, like today, and jotting my feelings down to share with you. It’s important for anyone with healing energy and a presence to honor themselves, because like I said, you can’t pour from an empty cup…
It took far to long for me to get back to being myself… and a few expensive therapy sessions to boot! We all need to be more conscious of when our energy is leaving and not being refilled. I know that I want my aura to always be a safe harbor for those that need healing, but I know now even more that I need to protect that aura more so than I had. We can’t give more than we receive and at the end of the day, you don’t owe anyone your healing. Your healing is a gift; treat it as such and we’ll never be empty again.
